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Two single senior men discuss dating tips and opportunities in 2017

Two single, senior men discuss dating tips and opportunities in 2017

It seems around the start of each year, I hear--more often than during the rest of the year--from older singles who want to discuss the issues involved with dating and seeking a mate. It is the time of year when people reflect on their lives and realize they'd like to have a mate. Often, it is women who contact me.

But this year, I heard from several men. Two of those men, both 69, and both divorced within the last few years, I met with in person.

Coffee with Jim

On December 30, I met with Jim at the Starbucks across from the famous Mission San Juan Capistrano; we discussed the south Orange County, California, senior dating scene. Jim had read an article in The Capistrano Dispatch, one of the three newspapers I write for, and thought I might be able to suggest where to meet quality senior women in and around southern Orange County.

While he and I were discussing the importance of older singles getting out of the house and becoming involved in activities, I spotted my friend, Ann Ronan, sitting at a window table.

Ann is well known in San Juan Capistrano; she owns San Juan Capistrano Travel, and has been a SJC Chamber of Commerce board member since 2012, and is also a board member of the Friends of the Library, not to mention being a docent at the Mission SJC.

I introduced Ann to Jim; Ann told him she met her husband Ted online nine years ago. Learning that piqued Jim’s interest as he hadn’t had much luck in the online dating arena.

Ann said, “Attending local Chamber of Commerce mixers and events is a great way to meet new people.

“And, cruises are also a way to meet other singles. Most cruise lines have meet and greets at the beginning of the cruise so singles can get to know each other. Norwegian Cruise Lines has several ships with solo cabins so singles don't have to pay double (also known in cruise ship jargon as "the single supplement." The solo cabins are all in the same area of the ship with their own private lounge with coffee/tea and TV available and a cocktail hour each night where the singles can mingle.”

Jim enjoys riding his bike and said meeting people along the bike trails isn’t easy, but there is always a chance that he can make some new friends there as well.

By coincidence, later that night, I received an email from a woman named Yoko, who is now a Champ, who said, “I recently started receiving your weekly online newsletter and I have to say those newsletters are a hoot.”

Of course, Yoko’s comment got my attention, so I read further.

She said, “I am 61 and just moved to SJC and am having the time of my life. Orange County is raining men! I have met so many wonderful people and even though I have finally narrowed my dating to one man, I keep in touch with others as I value their friendships.

“Senior dating is about the attitude. If you grumble and complain all the time, who wants to be around you? Tell those singles out there to be positive, happy, active and volunteer in programs that help those less fortunate than themselves.”

Yoko added: “I’ve discovered great biking trails, and hiking is fantastic in OC. I volunteer in a homeless outreach and a food pantry through my church. Meetup.com (an online activity website, not a dating site) is also a great place to meet people.

Another place for seniors to make new acquaintances is in the Emeritus program at Saddleback College. The courses offered there are free to seniors. Champs can check out similar programs in their cities.

Yoko is right. Senior singles hoping to meet other singles need to get out and involved in activities in their local cities and towns as she has done with so much energy and enthusiasm.

Lunch with Champ Wayne

Wednesday, I had lunch with Champ Wayne, at a restaurant called the Lumberyard in Laguna Beach, which is just up the road a few miles from Dana Point, where I live, and a few miles down Pacific Coast Highway from Newport Beach, where Wayne lives.

Wayne has often contributed comments to our newsletter. He is a very together guy and is not currently involved in a relationship. Until recently, he was in a long-distance relationship with a woman in Massachusetts. A friend had introduced them.

The relationship did not work out. Wayne said, “Senior long distance relationships are difficult. I have my life here on the West coast and she has her life on the East coast.” Wayne will email me his thoughts on the challenges of long-distance relationships, which I shall publish in a future newsletter.

Both Jim and Wayne would enjoy having a compatible mate. But, as so many senior single women know, it’s hard to meet the right one.

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A column similar to the above article appeared in:

The San Juan Capistrano Dispatch on January 4, 2017

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