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Matt and Cheryl – Successful senior internet long-distance relationship

June 21, 2019

Matt and Cheryl – A successful senior internet long-distance relationship

Setting the stage–October 2015:

Cheryl, 68, twice divorced from “two very unhappy marriages.” Lives in Ohio. Owns a horse and a home. Two kids, both married. Grandchildren in Ohio nearly grown. She’s lived within 30 minutes of them from the time they were born. All family members live in Ohio and she has many friends there as well. She’s also very involved in her church.

Using free online dating site OK Cupid. Answered 600+ questions on Cupid questionnaire.

Cheryl says, “I know many of your readers have expressed skepticism regarding the safety and efficacy of online dating. I did background checks on a few of the men I was interested in.”

Did Sue waste a year on a long-distance relationship? For long distance relationships to work, both parties must make sacrifices. Usually, relocation is a part of long distance relationships.

January 22, 2017

Sue wrote," I met up with a friend from 40 years ago. I found out after six months that he is married. He says he has been separated for seven years, but can't divorce for financial reasons. We have been communicating for a year and met once. I believe he will never divorce so I stopped writing. Did I just waste a year?"


How can one simple paragraph have so many different aspects?


A natural and expected result of Internet dating is the creation of long-distance relationships. The good news: you've met someone with similar interests (hopefully, if the person is who he says he is). The bad news: he may live so far away it is difficult to spend time together and get to truly know each other.


Such is the case with Sue. She and the guy have only been together once in a year. That's hardly enough time to steal a kiss.

Does money matter in senior relationships? When the man has no money, is that a deal breaker?

December 01, 2016

An anonymous woman wrote about her new love, "I am deeply in love (which is truly wonderful), and yet---
"We dated 30 years ago for a year and stopped when he became too serious.  We married other people. I divorced after 25 years and decided to find him. I did not expect a hook-up; I genuinely cared about him, and just wanted to reconnect.
"His wife had died five years earlier, and he was just coming back into the world. He had not dated anyone.
"We talked for over two hours the first night, continued with emails and then I decided I wanted to see him. He wanted to see me.

Relocation is an issue in senior long distance relationships. This couple lives 2,000 miles apart; who is going to move, the man or the woman?

December 01, 2016

When older singles are involved in a long-distance relationship, it's most often a result of finding each other on the Internet.

But it's not always the Internet that spawns these relationships. You can meet someone who lives far away from you on a plane, train, trip, or at your friend Sally's house, when her brother visits from Oshkosh.

Long-distance relationships are good-news, bad-news situations. Good news because you've met a potential partner, something that often eludes mature singles. Bad news because bringing them to fruition is so challenging. Relocation is an issue in senior long distance relationships.

Long distance relationships can work

October 16, 2016

Senior long-distance relationships, usually the result of meeting online, can be trying if not impossible. They present so many obstacles that many couples decide they just aren't worth the effort.


Most couples want to be together on a daily basis. Not around the clock necessarily, but they want their main squeeze to be home with them at night. For a long-distance relationship to achieve that goal, one of the pair needs to relocate.


Often, singles are so entrenched with jobs or family and friends that moving to another city is out of the question. Hence, the long distance relationship sputters and fades away.

In senior long-distance relationships, infidelity is non-negotiable

October 02, 2016

The Internet is a valuable tool for singles over 50 to reach out beyond their social circle and meet potential mates who might live a block away, in another city, another state, or even in a different country.


Without the Internet, meeting these people likely would never happen.

Can long-distance relationships survive the distance?

August 26, 2016

The Internet has changed our lives in countless ways. For mature singles, it has opened up new possibilities of meeting potential mates. For singles living in remote areas, where potential partners are nearly nonexistent, it has given them the ability to reach out across fields, prairies, mountains and state lines to locate singles they would have otherwise never met.


As a result, long-distance relationships have formed. Hopes have been kindled. Life takes on new excitement, new meaning. Loneliness is lessened

Be cautious when moving to a new city to be with a man

August 04, 2016

The Internet makes it possible for a single person living in a remote area to meet someone in an area like Orange County, California, where available singles are more plentiful. Such was the case with Beth Ann, who asked that her last name be withheld.

Early last year, Beth Ann lived in Modesto. She was 56 and single. “Modesto is rural so most of the men are of the ‘pickup trucks with gun rack-mentality,’” e-mailed Beth Ann. “I was born in a city environment, so I was hopefully wanting to meet a ‘gentleman’ who not only wore blue jeans, but had a suit or two in his wardrobe and ‘cleaned up well.’”

Long-distance Relationships: an Internet phenomenon and challenge

August 04, 2016

Note from Tom: This article first was published October 25, 2002. It has been updated in 2016.

I'm amazed at the number of Orange County singles involved in long-distance relationships. Most but not all meet on the Internet, where finding singles in other parts of the country is easy.

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