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Moving to a different city or state to find love and tranquility.
Test the waters first.

By Tom P Blake - Finding Love after 50

Today's column is directed toward singles who think that moving to another city might make them happier and improve their chances of meeting a mate.

Diane tried it. When one Southern California company she worked for went out of business, and the next was sold after working for them for six months, she decided to make a fresh start by moving to Northern California.

Diane had always dreamed of a house near the ocean, and purchased one at La Selva Beach, in Santa Cruz County, just over the mountain from San Jose. The home was 400 yards from the sand, with beautiful country surrounding it and the stars at night were as bright as Christmas tree lights. The home was new and full of modern-day amenities. She felt she had moved to heaven.

For the first few years, Diane's Southern California friends visited and called her new home, "the Spa." They said they had never pictured her living in such an isolated location.

Diane says, "They were right. It was isolated and lonely. Very lonely. There was no single life whatsoever." She was living in a perfect place but missing a vital ingredient that singles can overlook when moving to greener pastures: people.

Two years ago, Diane had an opportunity to return to Southern California. "I jumped at it, "says Diane, "I'm delighted to live in Laguna Niguel, a city in south Orange County, With a myriad of opportunities so close at hand, I've made new friends, joined interesting organizations and have connected with my old friends."

One of the organizations Diane has joined is The Cabaret Singles, a group of professionals who meet the fourth Tuesday of every month in Irvine. She laughs about the men though: "We need some new members, particularly of the masculine gender. We ladies need someone to dance with." Single guys take heed.

Diane's advice to singles who are thinking of finding greener pastures is to try living there for a year to see if they like it. "While the countryside may be lovely, it doesn't take the place of an abundance of opportunities and the company of interesting people unless you enjoy being really alone. We have those opportunities and those people in Orange County. I love it!"

I know folks who left Orange County and moved to Florida, San Dimas, Chicago, Las Vegas,Belize, and the Pacific Northwest, only to scamper back after a year or so. Our weather's pretty great also.

Diane's right about the opportunities here. There are close to 500,000 singles over the age of 50 in Orange County. Somewhere in that haystack, there's somebody for you. You're chances of meeting a potential mate are better here than in Coloma. Don't underestimate the power of loneliness.

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