Tom Blake - Finding Love After 50 website

Welcome to finding love after 50. The website for middle aged singles and senior singles, providing information and dating advice for middle age dating and senior dating--for widows, divorcees, divorced men and widowers - answering their questions about dating after divorce, finding love, living together, dating younger women, dating younger men, dating after divorce, senior sex, middle age sex, where to meet men, remarriage and hundreds of other topics concerning middle age relationships and senior relationships.

Widow with positive
"Finding Love After 50"
dating attitude

A widow with a healthy dating attitude

A year ago, a widow who calls herself PG moved to Orange County from another country. I'm impressed with her dating attitude, and wanted to share it with you.

"I didn't know many people so making friends was a top priority. I'm impressed with the number of activities that are available to the middle-aged dating community, be it church, local organizations, senior centers, or the various singles groups like Widows and Widowers," PG said.

She tried a variety of ways to meet other singles, particularly widowers. She joined a matchmaking service, but wasn't impressed. Through the service, she met two people, but felt both misrepresented themselves.

PG is positive and upbeat. When we met in person, she told me she's had four marriage proposals in the past two years, but can't find anybody without some sort of heavy baggage.

One aspect that makes middle-age dating o difficult is finding someone compatible, this is why she felt meeting a widower would be best.

"I just stopped seeing a guy I met thru J Date (a website for Jewish singles). He turned out to be a secret smoker, was very chauvinistic, and expected me to to all of the phoning. We dated four months. Before we got more involved, I decided that the negatives were greater than the few positives," said PG.

Regarding meeting men via the Internet, PG shared, "What some guys write in their profiles, and what they say they are looking for, are often not true. There also seems to be a mad panic to see a photograph before getting together. Some older single men hardly want to talk on the phone first, but wish to meet for coffee."

When PG goes to a restaurant with a date, she watches his behavior. "A good yardstick is how a guy treats the restaurant staff, and whether he pours over the bill and nitpicks it or not. Tells me a lot, and hasn't failed to yield a correct assessment in the long run," said PG.

She mentioned that establishing a long-distance relationship with somebody living in another area--like Palm Springs or San Diego--is difficult. She added: "It takes the spontaneity out of a lot of things one could do on a day-to-day basis, like meet for a quick lunch, a cup of tea, or a gym workout."

PG has four grown children and eight grandchildren. She enjoys them, but doesn't allow them to get in the way of her middle-age dating. She says she is surprised at the number of men 55-plus who still have kids' issues, which makes building a relationship with them difficult.

PG's views on dating represent a cross section of what people face when they get out there in middle-age dating again.

Unfortunately, it's not a perfect dating world. People lie, people aren't what they represent themselves to be. None of us are perfect; some are more grounded than others.

PG's challenge, and the challenge for all mid-life singles, widows and widowers, is to find a gemstone amid the pile of rocks. To her credit, she's working hard at it, and she's only been in this country one year.

With her dating attitude, she'll find the right partner soon.

Tom's other sites

Travel After 55
A Guide for Senior Travel and Romance

How 50 Couples Found Love After 50

Tutor and Spunky's Deli in Dana Point

Prime Rib & Boxcars...
Whatever Happened to Victoria Station

Tom's Ebooks

Tom's 5-star rental property in Sonoma County, California

2011 by Tom Blake
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