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Western wedding. Older singles get creative and then get married. Author and columnist Tom Blake provides dating information and advice for widowers,
widows, divorced men, divorced women, middle-aged singles boomer singles and senior singles who are dating again and hope to meet a mate.
Western Wedding
© 2004 by Tom Blake
Many ways to corral that podner
By TOM BLAKE
For The Register's South County Weekly Newspapers
May 27, 2004
Cassandra Kirk and Bruce Nielson are getting hitched! Join us for a Western wedding celebration, 4 p.m., Saturday May 22, Sonrise Ranch,
Trabuco Oaks Road. Feast and fun to follow. Western attire."
Cassandra, mid-50s, works for the Orange County School system. Three years ago, she joined the San Juan Capistrano Fiesta Association, a fun-loving,
250-member nonprofit group that sponsors the Swallows Day Parade each April.
Through the association, she started dating Bruce, also a member, who's responsible for the lighting and sound systems for the parade.
From the git-go, it was obvious that this wedding was highly organized with the comfort of the guests as the top priority. At the sign-in table, each person was
issued a sheriff's badge bearing his or her name and directed to an area covered by canopies to congregate and enjoy a chilled beverage.
"deputy" sporting a handlebar mustache, dressed in a long black coat, holding a 12-gauge shotgun – with "Boots" on his name badge – said, "How often
do you get invited to a wedding where you can bring your gun?"
Dining tables were situated in a corral that also served as the chapel. Horses had been moved to holding areas on both sides. Place mats read: "Dance 'til the
cows come home."
Instead of traditional organ music before the ceremony, country and Western was played, including the theme from "The Magnificent Seven."
After arriving by horse and buggy, the bride was escorted to an elevated stage by her son Robert, also toting a rifle.
A noose was dangling from a beam. Mother and son waited with the minister for the groom. Five minutes passed. The bride seemed concerned. Some folks –
including me – not knowing if this was planned, felt bad for her. Finally, guests exposed the groom's whereabouts and Cassandra yelled, "Shoot him," and dispatched her son
to haul him to the stage by gunpoint.
The members in the wedding party – dressed in Western garb – acted out a skit where the maid of honor tried to win the groom away and the best man tried to
win the bride away. A pinto 20 feet away in a stall was chewing on hay.
When the minister said, "Now for the serious part," he went right to the vows; the ceremony was over in eight minutes. To the sound of David Bowie's "Golden Years,"
Bruce and Cassandra left the stage.
Bruce grabbed an iced Guinness Stout and announced, "Let's eat, drink and have fun."
A feast followed with food served buffet style in an adjacent corral. Greta and I agreed we'd never had a better wedding dinner: barbecue pork ribs, tri-tip
beef, coleslaw with peanuts, homemade macaroni and cheese, and a tasty wedding cake.
Cassandra's lesson for older singles: If you're single and would like to meet a mate, don't ever give up hope. Get involved in life.
The Fiesta Association welcomes new members. Its Web site, www.swallowsparade.com, states:
"You're wanted."
Six couples who've met there have married.
Cassandra showed us where she and Bruce were spending their wedding night – in the wedding suite – a large two-room tent behind the stage. Why of
course. What a refreshing couple.
It was the most fun wedding Greta and I have ever attended.
Weekly comments
Joe, Santa Monica, "I'm investigating a trip to Bangkok; maybe I can find a wife there. Eighteen hours of flying is a lot for a date, but probably worth it compared
to the hour of travel and 17 hours of torture to date an L.A. woman."
Paul, Costa Mesa, "At 67, I still want an intimate relationship after we become friends. If the chemistry isn't there, the relationship will end."
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