Finding Love After 50

Author and columnist Tom Blake provides dating information and advice for widowers, widows, divorced men, divorced women, middle-aged singles boomer singles and senior singles who are dating again and hope to meet a mate.



   Finding Love Hard for Men As Well             © 2004 by Tom Blake

Finding Love Also Hard for Men

“According to the odds you quoted in
a recent column, there should be four women
to every man my age (67) but where are they?”
asked Paul Rubin, Costa Mesa.

I answered: “Women can be found via Internet
dating sites, at senior centers and doing volunteer
work. What do you do to try to meet them?”

Paul wrote back, “I’ve been taking square dance
classes three nights a week since March and I
recently went to four single club events. I’m
slim, kind of, and health-minded. I walk or go
to the gym almost every day and am looking for
a companion with similar interests.”

Paul further explained: “Maybe I don’t know
what a 60-year-old woman should look like, but
I seem to see only 50 or 70-year-old women.”

Regarding the Internet, Paul said, “Internet
dating sites show women all over the state while
I’m looking for someone within say 15 miles.
I get e-mails from women in Los Angeles, the
Valley, upstate, other states and even Russia.
They have been too impersonal for me.”

So, Orange County women in your 60s, where
are you?

Here are a few suggestions for Paul. But
first I need to say that there is not a shortage
of 60-year-old women in OC. I give speeches—
for example, at Leisure World in Laguna
Woods—where 85 percent of the people in
attendance are women. Perhaps Paul should
establish contact with someone there and attend
social events there.

I’ve often given talks at the 30 or so senior
centers in OC. The ratio of single women to
men is similar to that at Leisure World. Paul would
find many women his age willing to share
a cup of coffee with him if he’d attend events
at our centers.

And there’s the Aliso Viejo Singles Volunteers,
a powerhouse group of wonderful people doing
humanitarian projects, founded and hosted by
Ginny Reid.

Most of the members are women.
If Paul would go to my website, and click
on “Orange County Activities for Singles”
at the bottom of the home page, he’d find
information on Ginny’s group plus other
activities, such as Mission Viejo-based Marge’s Tours.

Marge has one-day excursions to places like the
Hollywood Bowl, Reagan Library, the Getty
and Sea World. Chances are Paul’s seatmate
would be a single woman.

Paul sounds like a go-getter, he’s active in
square dancing and the gym. By taking
even more initiative in checking places out,
he’d meet all kinds of single women in OC.

Regarding the Internet. If Paul isn’t finding
women in Orange County in his age range,
he needs to expand his Internet presence by
trying other match sites, like Yahoo! Personals
or There are likely thousands
of older OC women searching on the Internet.

Who knows? Perhaps women readers of this
column will show an interest in Paul and
contact me about him.

And one last word of advice to Paul. Don’t
overlook women in their late 60s or 70s.
You easily could find your gem in that
age group.

Now Paul, get out there and continue
your search.

* * *

Precious little book on heartbreak and
recovery, written by WCCO
Minneapolis radio talk show
host, Brad Walton

To comment, e-mail
or write P.O. Box 442, Dana Point, 92629.
Include your full name and city. Tom is
in Costa Rica and won’t answer e-mails
until September 2.

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