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Finding Love After 50--at the barn
Love After 50: Building a "stable" relationship
Just when I seem to be getting in good standing with women readers, I write a column which upsets some of them, and in this case, an entire group: the
women "horse community."
Two weeks ago, I wrote a column based on comments from Bruce of Laguna Beach, Calif., about avoiding dates with single women who love horses. I
thought the column was light and bouncy.
Egad, I didn't realize the camaraderie of "the horse community." Well, at least the women in "the horse community" (No equestrian men responded).
I knew I was in trouble when the first response I received was from a woman in the San Francisco Bay Area. Amazing, this newspaper doesn't even
circulate up there. She wrote, "I thought your article on horse women was extremely distasteful. The article stunk. We aren't all snobby people who care only for our horses."
Then, she laid on the guilt, "I think it's incredibly sad that you're trying to write about "Love After 50' but you are contributing to the already negative attitude
toward the equestrian community. Only men who are extremely insecure should have a problem with dating a horse person."
Before the ink was dry in the Laguna Niguel News, Jane, who resides there, responded, "Here's some advice to any man who gets involved with a woman
who loves horses:
-Be sure you're more interesting than the horse -If you're only interested in a roll in the hay (pardon the pun),then you get exactly what you deserve while you're
driving the truck and shoveling manure."
Corinne, Newport Beach, interpreted the column as I had hoped: "My friends-fellow equestriennes-and I had a good laugh." I guess I can find love after 50 at
some horse barns.
Marianne, Long Beach, said, "Some people treat their pets so lovingly and attentively, every bowel movement is an event to cherish."
Corinne and Marianne don't get this newspaper either. Love after 50 news travels fast in "the horse community".
In all fairness, we need to share what men said. "When a woman has a horse to ride, she doesn't need a man to nag," said George, Dana Point.
Bruce, who perpetrated this mess, recommended the Del Mar Race Track on a summer afternoon for prolific women watching. "Forget the grandstands,"
Bruce says, " park a lawn chair on the infield near the betting windows." He can't seem to escape the lure of horse women.
Patrick, 59, also from Laguna Beach, responded by e-mail from Cusco, Peru, where he's on vacation: "I have a checklist of where I fit into the hierarchy of a
woman's life. There are the usual items that come ahead of the man--kids, jobs, friends, parents, and pets. If I can't make it ahead of the pets (a horse is a large pet), I pass."
Horsewoman Jane added, "It is possible for a man to coexist with a horse. I've been married (to the same man) for 30+ years." Coexist with a horse? Not
my definition of love after 50.
And the anonymous San Francisco woman said, "Love can happen between two people who don't have the same interests." I think what she's suggesting is
a man can have a "stable" relationship with a horse woman even if he isn't into horses.
With that, I'm riding off into the sunset to seek love after 50 elsewhere. Perhaps, at the zoo.