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Blue collar and white collar dating. Author and columnist Tom Blake provides dating information and advice for widowers, widows, divorced men, divorced
women, middle-aged singles boomer singles and senior singles who are dating again and hope to meet a mate.
Single Women Bash Single Men
© 2004 by Tom Blake
Monday, February 2, 2004
Observations on finding a man
Each year in January, singles fill my in-box with observations on the state of dating.
For single women, there's always a common denominator: a frustration with men. Mincing no words, 14 women from Southern California and across
North America explain why finding a good man is difficult.
Kristina, Long Beach: "I think in SoCal the ratio between women and men over 50 is 2.5 or 3-to-1. Out here, it's mostly women driving Corvettes and Porsches."
Nicki, 55, Seattle area: "Men my age are usually - excuse the term - 'shopworn.' "
Shirley, Manhattan Beach: "So far, few men have suited me. They aren't flexible about women's ages; they're looking for 'chicks' and a 'quick fix.'
They use the word 'chemistry' a lot as an excuse. Will older men wake up?"
Shelly, 47, near Canton, Ohio: "Most men are in the dark ages. They want someone to take care of them: cook, clean and meet their every needs.
I don't want to do that anymore."
Teri, Fair Lawn, N.J.: "This dating stuff is hard. I went on a couple of dates, but am at the point of hanging (it) up. The last one was a disaster. The guy talked
a mile a minute, kept changing his stories and smelled of alcohol."
Marie, Toronto: "Intellectually, men aren't all the same; the more I know about them emotionally, the less I want to know them."
Beverly, Los Angeles: "The problem for those of us over 50 is the men. They don't step up and ask women out. Do they think they're going to find
'something better' around the bend? Don't they realize they're in the bend?"
Jeannie, Fort Lauderdale: "A guy wanted to fix me up with his widowed brother. The brother called me for the first four days. He suggested
I go to Key West with him overnight, but I'm an old-fashioned girl, even at 54. Haven't heard from him since."
Jan, Charlottesville, Va.: "The last two men I dated wanted me to be their everything. I don't want that. They'd watch TV and wait for me to finish
what I was doing so that they could monopolize my time. I want a man who has a rich and full life - that's what attracts women."
Jean, Orange (now happily married): "A while back, a guy 12 years older told me what good shape I was in, that I looked young and attractive.
When I told him I couldn't get involved, he got mad and said, 'You don't have much time left. After all, you're 62.' "
Cindy, Lake Grove, N.Y.: "A charming gentleman asked me to dinner. Halfway through the veal piccata, he said, 'I took my Viagra. I'm hopeful.'
Dating sure has changed since I was 19."
Anita, Meeteetse, Wyo.: "I find the guys I've met online want to hurry the relationship. I'm getting more picky as time goes by."
Susan Wheeler, Wylie, Texas: "I met a gentleman at a country-Western club. We seemed to have a lot in common. I called it quits because he came on
too fast and too strong. He wanted to see me every minute of every day, and when I'd turn him down, he'd whine."
Diana Condon, Philadelphia: "Men today are single for a good reason: The world has tested them and they're not the marrying type. Or, they're so overwhelmed
by their past lives and experiences, they're emotionally unstable."
So, to shopworn single men who've found dating to be a tad slow, stop using the word "chemistry" as an excuse, heed the hints of these women, and your
dating successes might improve. At the least, you'll make women happier.
Reader Comments
Emma, Huntington Beach: "When singles place personal ads, it's important they include their age. 'Somewhere between 50 and death' is a wide
range. I try to avoid the near-death ones."
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