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Finding love after 50. The website for middle aged singles and senior singles, providing information and dating advice for middle age dating and senior dating.
This column's topic:
Single Women: When your jerk radar goes off, run
This is a plea to single women: Trust your
instincts and avoid getting involved with cheaters or
jerks.
Lately, stories have crossed my desk that indicate
some Orange County women aren't following their
instincts. They agreed to share their stories but
wanted only their first names used.
Michele described dating a neighbor.
"He came on strong, spent lots of time with me. The
first night I stayed at his house, we were awoken by a
5:30 a.m. call from a woman. He claimed it was a wrong
number. At 7 p.m., she called again. I left his house.
A few days later, I knocked on his door, and there was
a woman on his living room floor. Then there was the
family friend who stayed for a long weekend."
Michele said she got involved because she was
"dangerously attracted" to him. Remember the movie
"Fatal Attraction"? Dangerous attractions – where you
follow your hormones instead of your head – are
no-no's.
He was a player; Michele was foolish.
Two lessons here: Don't get involved with a
womanizer. And don't date someone you'll have to see
if it doesn't work out (like a neighbor or co-worker).
And this from Cindy in Santa Ana: "I had a second
date with a guy I'd met at the gym. When he kissed me
goodnight, he asked, what I was expecting from this? I
said I didn't want my tender heart broken.
"He told me he'd slept with about 200 women, and
that once he was involved, he'd get bored in a couple
of weeks and dump them."
Cindy then tried to convince this guy that she was
the exceptional woman who could tame him.
She should have bowed out when he bragged of his
200 conquests. Aside from risks of sexually
transmitted disease, a guy like that will always have
a roving eye.
Many intelligent women don't walk away from jerks
when they should. They're eternal optimists;
loneliness clouds their thinking; or they have strange
attractions to evil men. They think they can fix the
world and the flakes they meet.
Move on until a more sensible, caring, considerate
and thoughtful man comes along (they do exist). And if
one doesn't, don't compromise your values or your
pride. Being single is far better than being in a
relationship with a cheater, player or jerk.
READER COMMENTS
Ethel, Sylvia and Betty, Mission
Viejo: "We are three lovely, personable,
intelligent single ladies who live in an upscale
retirement community. We enjoy participating in all
the activities available to us. It's almost like
living at camp.
"What we lack is the company of men. The Internet
is too impersonal. Can your readers suggest other ways
to meet single men between 65 and 75 who would like
our company?"
Response: We'll see who responds.
Barbara McDaniel, Ramblin' Rogues Square
Dance Club: "We meet the first Friday of every month
at the Orange Women's Center, 131 Center St., Orange.
Dances run from 7:30 p.m. to 10:30. Lots of nice women
available. Call Peggy and John Martin, (949) 472-8344,
for details about new classes starting."
Friday, September 5, 2003
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