Finding love after 50. Author and columnist Tom Blake shares dating information and advice for widowers, widows, divorced men, divorced
women, middle-aged singles boomer singles and senior singles who are dating again and hope to meet a mate.
Should the name of this column,
"Middle Age Relationships," be changed?
Larry, Laguna Niguel, e-mailed, "Being in my forties (45), I've always wondered why you call your column' Middle Age Relationships.' Maybe you are off about 10 years."
Larry felt that since life expectancy is nearing 80, middle age should start at 40.
"I'm sure if you surveyed south Orange county you'd be surprised at how many single persons you'd find in their 40s who are looking for the same thing. Do we have to wait in limbo to utilize your column until we hit the majestic number of '50?'" Larry asked.
A little title history is in order. When the column began 496 weeks ago (July 4, 1994), it was called "Middle Aged and Dating Again."
Two women editors at the "Register" community newspapers decided they'd have some fun by publishing the sorry and pathetic dating exploits of a newly-divorced 53-year-old man named Tom Blake. You see, Blake was desperately seeking romance after his wife had dumped him on Xmas Eve 1993.
In 1997, the column title was changed to "Middle Age Relationships." The stated reason was: the column's focus had changed to other people's relationships and dating adventures with only an occasional column about Blake's dating mis-adventures. That was a window-dressing response.
However, the true reason--if you must know--was that Blake had found romance and Blake's girlfriend at the time was being teased by her co-workers with comments like, "How can you be involved with a guy who writes about dating?" She felt insecure so Blake wimped out and changed the title to "Middle Age Relationships."
Didn't matter, the relationship ended anyway. Back to the question, should the column's name be changed for the second time in nine years?
Mary, Costa Mesa, wrote, "I think the title could be 'Finding Love After 40,' since so many are trying to find someone. It's nice to know that the under-50 are in the same boat. We all need to know we can find love at any age, and thanks to you it's okay to share and speak about it in a local forum."
Mary, Lake Forest, said, "Reaching out to the younger set? Good idea. They're not that far from the magic #50. Might as well be ready for the next phase of their lives." Blake's life partner Greta could care less about the title, she merely reminds him "To get it written and not miss the deadline."
We'll stick with "Middle Age Relationships" as the title and tackle instead a bigger challenge in 2004: getting singles of all ages to share their tips, comments, observations, advice and experiences along with their names and cities, so that the column continues to be vital and fresh.
Besides, what's in a title? Well, Middle Aged Relationships is.